::Etiquette de soirée pyjama::

First I'll warn that this post might be a little rant(ish) post. But I wouldn't say it's an angsty rant, more like uh.. "I'm not pleased on ignorant people" -rant.

My post's subject is "People who come over at your house". Because is there ANY sort of etiquette of what or what not to do before and during (possibly after) your stay on friends place?
   I mean ofc this is just my opinion on this subject and I'm not saying that everyone has to do this. I really don't have rules, but more like guidelines. Basic stuff that would be polite of you to do if you plan to visit someone (me).

•    Rule #1: Ask if it is okay to come over OR at least notify them early if you're coming.

Because it's rude to just pop in unnoticed! Unless ofc you know that they like it. Okay one night is still acceptable. But more than that, no.

•    Rule #2: Tell them how long you are staying.

Is it really that hard to state how long you're staying? There's nothing more annoying than a person who comes over and just stays. Or when you politely try to pry "how long are you going to stay?" you get "As long as you like me here" ,I admit that I get the idea here. But srsl, that is actually THE worst kind of answer you could give me. Because I suck at saying ppl when it's time to go. I'll just keep quiet and take my own needs away and let you be around like 2 weeks if you want. I just think I'll hurt you so deeply if I mention that it's your time to leave. Well my luck still is that I live in home, so mom is also at some point starting to hint that it's time to end this visit. 

•    Rule #3: Take any stuff you feel necessary with you.

I think that you should be able to pack your own bag. Like I don't know how many underwear you use during your visit.  And if you aren't sure about something (like towels ors.) you can ask. But don't be idiot and ask "what should I take with me?" , like..  Well YOU'RE the one who's coming over, not me.  You are allowed to use your  brain.

•    Rule #4: I am not a hotel.

If you think that you'll get served and treated as in hotel, please check yourself in one!  I still live in home and I buy ~80% of my own food, so don't think that I'll share it.  If you're staying more than one night, it would be nice to  participate in expenses.  We ain't no millionaires! If I'd   live alone this would be like automatic thing.  You can either buy your own food or pay some part from the  food that I'm making for you. How would you feel like if a friend would come over for unknown time and you'd have to pay their living up? 

•    Rule #5: The house rules.

This is more like of a minor detail. But I think it's worth listing for. Every house has it's own unwritten book of rules that it goes by. When you are over, you have to respect the household's rules and play by them. Or at least not directly rebel against them. And if you don't know what they are, ask, ask, ask and ask.  For example, when you're done eating do you put the plate into dishwasher? Or do they have some recycling system that you need to know. etc. Ofc if you have hung out in the house multiple times before you probably know these things. But to a total newcomer it can be unclear. Don't expect to be treated like a royalty.

•    Bonus Rule: Have your own opinions and will with you.

This is not really a rule rule, more like a thing I've noticed some people have. Like, when you come over you're suddenly a different person. I get that first day might be kind of awkward and you're shy. But after that, like PLEASE! Have your own opinions and will. When I ask "what do you want to do/ would you like to do something?" it's your chance to get to say it. I'm trying, now it's your turn. Because if you say "whatever . Everything is fine with me." Then my inner me goes "well fine! As you wish." And I shall do whatever pleases me, and you have to suck it up! I'm really poor at my entertaining skills, I'm anxious around people and I try to be nice and consider your opinion since you've come to my place. But if you start with that "Idk/whatever", I'm going to treat you like that then. And you can ask/say anything at anytime, not just when I ask.

I think those are the biggest things in my mind to rant about. I've experienced them multiple times. So hence the annoyance and ranting about it. I feel like I sound harsh and/or rude, but I'm just so sick of these things. For me the 2nd one is important. I'm really a terrible people person. My mind starts to suffer and my anxiety starts to rise rapidly if I have to spend time with someone 24/7 for over 48h. I can see you everyday, if I can then close into my own room for the rest of the day. But when someone is over you don't have your own time and I need that probably a lot more than an average person. And I'm so uh, it might seem polite, but I think it's roots go back to anxiety and bad self-esteem, SO I just have a lot of problem on telling when you need to go. I just seem fine outside, even happy. But on the inside I'm pitch black and nervous and annoyed and feeling huge amounts of anxiety. And you might notice it slightly by how I communicate or be, I kind of curl back to my own shell and become more absent on the moment. When I cannot have my "me-time" my mind forces me to take it in some form. 

But I think that's pretty much it. Sorry for a long pause, I'll try to write more! Next time on some happy thing I hope (:

-Cakey

Make a good title.

Sorry I've been abusing my blog by being away and not writing.
I had inspiration this night of what I want to write.
I actually have two posts unfinished in my drafts, I might post other one if I ever end up finishing it.

So my topic of what I wanted to write about in here. I watched a movie, it came from tv.

Vicky Christina Barcelona

Only reason I watched it was the actors in it. First Scarlett Johansson, then there's also Penelope Cruz, Javier Bardem and Rebecca Hall. I did not know what to expect, just seen few commercials on tv that it's coming. Seemed like a romatic drama ors.

And most amazing thing was that I really really liked the movie. I usually don't go for that types of movies, and well the fact that I liked the cast was bonus. But even if they would've casted people I don't know I would've liked it. Plot was interesting and not boring, even tou the beginning didn't seem so good, but it got better.

Most of all what got me was Christina's character. Her view of love and life in general was really alike to mine. And I thought during the movie like "oh my god that's so me!" .. Like I'm really hard person to be in a relationship with. And I need this weird space and I cannot just be with one person or I feel suffocated. And for me, I'm not jealous type of person. At least in relationship, all I need is trust and open mind. And not many have that. Anyways, I'll recommend that movie to anyone who wants to take a different kind of look into love and life.

And the other thing that hit me while I was watching that movie, was my restless feeling.

I'd LOVE to just drop evertything and move to a other country for a summer or year and just have fun and experience things and then pack my bag again and move to a next place. I don't want to settle in one place, and my heart craves to get the fuck out of here. But no money, no .. .. place to go. and well, I have cat(s) so it wouldn't work that well. Anyways I'd just love to travel around and not to worry when I need to get home ors. 

I'm afraid that I just get stuck into Finland forever. 

------

In other news, if you haven't notice from my 'Find Cakey' -page, I have second blog dedicated to my Farrelleto fic, and if you're patient you might find a new short fic from there soon ;)

Until we meet again- Cakey