Sick of being sick

As you can probably guess from my title I've been, and still am sick. It's the only reason why I haven't been updating my blog. I'm completely drained from energy, but I feel responsible that I need to post at least something in here.

This started on last weeks Friday. Out of nowhere, boom! I got fever, and straight to 38-39° (Celsius, go and find your Fahrenheit converter yourself!) and that's a lot for me. I don't know like what's my normal body temperature is, but when I'm even like 36,8° I'm not feeling well.

  And also the coughing started, and next day it had gone worse and my slight cough was now terrible. And I started to cough (slime/)sputum out. And felt that there was a giant ball of mucus/slime stuck deep on my throat that makes breathing hard. 

  And of course all the wonderful joint and muscles pains gets extra painful.

So since my fever didn't drop, and my nights were hell to sleep (even with the power of painkillers). We decided to go to see doctor. Since I wasn't so thrilled to go and queue for hours on the public side, we reserved appointment on private site. Right on Monday.

  For those who don't know Finnish healthcare system is lil different. There's public side that's open to all and then there's Private side. But it costs much (well compared to public), but if you have insurance you can get part of your money back from there. (difference is like public~15€ and private~+70€) 

First I had thought that "Fuck No, I'm so not having another angina AGAIN!" (It would've been my 5th within a year) and of course I told the doctor my doubts and all that's been bugging my body etc. And he said that he really can't be sure. Since my lymph nodes aren't that swollen and my tonsils are looking ok. But he sent me to get tested in lab just to be sure.

  I assumed it was only (I think it's called) pharynx culture, you know when they took the long cotton swap thingie and swipe it on your throat and it feels like your gonna throw up, yes? But I soon found out that they also needed my blood. There's seriously nothing I hate more than blood tests. I'd rather take a pet spider than let people steal my blood. Usually they're taken from elbow pit/crook. I have good veins and they're easy to sting, but my elbow crooks are really sensitive. And it's always like "It's like a mosquito bite, it wont hurt long. Just a little sting :)" WELL FUCK NO! I can fucking feel the needle in my vein and the pressure when the blood goes in the tube! I'd rather take one mosquito bite. I've been told that it can be because my vein has a "V-shape" that it crosses soon after that so it can be more sensitive because of that.

But the lady who was taking it saw how totally inner panicing I was and asked if I preferred that we took the test from finger tip. My eyes widened and I was like "Really? You could take it from my finger, yeah. That would be so much better" It didn't hurt at all when she took the blood test. And when I panic of blood tests I'm barely breathing and uncontrollably shaking and firmly keeping my hands tied so no one can sting me with their evil needles.

  But yeah the doctor really couldn't do more than order me more painkillers and get me tested. 

So my mom was impatient and wanted a solution faster. We could see some of the results from computer like next day. And mom called the doctor, apparently the guy works in private only on Mondays and on public for rest of the week. Oh, my mom is also working on healthcare -industry so she knows usually and she knows what those tests means etc. 

   And my fever just didn't come down. It's really painful. It's either too hot or too cold and it's never a good position. And the coughing hurts and oh god now I'm sweating my ass off, so I'll toss the blanket away, But wait! Now it's too cold. So yeah. 

  So! Mom called to the guy and he said that why didn't we go to public? And that we need to get my fever down, because if it wont come down it's starting to make my organs feel too hot and the heat starts to damage them. And that when I've had ten days of fever she should call again or do smt. I really don't remember correctly what, but yeah.

And then mom told that I need to be taken new blood tests, but she can take them in here. But I need to go and get taken new pharynx culture. I really was at too bad shape to panic and resist mom at Friday morning when she took two tubes of blood out of me. and later that morning I went to hospital to get that test done.

Mom saw the results later that day on computer at her work and my inflammation rates were sky high (for normal ppl they're like less than 5 or 10, mine were 60), so something is wrong. But we still don't know the culture's result... We'll see them on Monday then.

So today's ninth day of me being sick. And mom is worried to sick. My fevers been everyday over 38°, witch isn't good. My every single muscle is aching. It even hurts to breathe. My lungs hurt. I'm tired of coughing, because every time I cough, my abs hurt so much that I feel them my stomach rips apart and my back snaps in pieces. There's tinnitus in my ears all of the time, the volume of it just changes.  My head aches. I feel like every breath I take is penetrating acid in my lungs. My skin feels like it's melting off and sticking to every surface that it touches. There's no power in my movements. I have lost my apetite. The fever is making me have terrible nightmares and they woke me up and I cannot sleep after that anymore. Then there's always oh so pleasure with arrhythmia.

  The only thing that I try to do is force myself to eat at least something everyday. But I drink a lot, well I probably sweat most of it off.

Mom said that it's probably already got into my lungs and it's most likely either pneumonia or bronchitis.

Einari has kept me company a lot. He needs attentions and since most of my, well all of my days I'm laying on sofa. He has come to see if I'm alive like every fifteen minutes and meows at my face and always needing scratching :'D Like now. He insisted to get in my lap even tou there's laptop and not much space. Well he's my 'little' black sunshine ♥

I'm sorry I haven't write my latest Movie Monday, I DID keep my Avengers -marathon, even thought I didn't feel like it, since I was so drained. But I did. I've also watched all the Scrubs I own, I need moar ;;--;;.

Sincerely yours, Cakey.

Oh, and ps. I'm going to doctor's on Monday. again. To see what's next. I hope I wont be hospitalized. 

Doom of Laziness

Again I'm procrastinating the writing. I have like tons of things I want to write, but instead I sit still and surf on other sites waiting that feeling to go away. I doesn't go away until I actually write.
One step of that is that I actually write the 'headline' (or subject, whatever) and if I'm planning to add pics, upload/take them. So I've done those already. And then comes the hardest part:
Actual writing, especially the start.
But when I do it the sneaky way like this; apologizing the fact I haven't write or telling I want to write I get the kick to start. Then comes new hard part:
Continuing to the main subject I had in my mind.
How can you jump from this to like shoes and fragrances? There's no way you can just smoothly to slide onto that subject.
But as you can see I just did it ;D

So yes! I was about to talk partly of shoes and fragrances. Kinda. I mean I'm gonna do perfectly independent own post for both of them at some point. But now I'm just slightly hoovering on top of those subjects.

Today when I was going to get mail, I was hoping there would be nice package for me, and there was.
I had ordered 4 pairs of fancy shoelaces and they arrived! But I only have one pair of shoes! XD
I mixed two of them and I'm kinda satisfied to them, but one of the laces did not satisfied my expectation!
Here are all three pics, first one from the net site where I ordered the laces. Then how they really looked like and last my shoes with new laces :)

You can maybe guess which ones are the non-look-a-like-enough??
Maybe. Well the zebra ones, I mean they look pretty neat and bright colored. I think they are too dark and Idk. There's something I can't put my finger on that annoys me little on them.
But yes, I'm not saying they are ugly and blergh. I'm just saying that they aren't so fancy that I expected.

Also you may notice that I love animal pattern! :'D
My fave pattern is leopard. And then comes tigers/zebras and then everything else. I think there ain't not a single animal pattern that I dislike.
And I have quite a lot of different kind of things with all kinds of animal patterns. I'm wearing leopard patterned socks atm! XD Oh and yeah I have turquoise colored leopard spots on my left instep! Gonna add some lime colored spots as well :)
And if I'm shopping/window shopping and there's something with animal patterns I instantly (usually) want them!
But I'm against real fur. And breeding/capturing/hunting animals for their furs (or bones, or anything!)... Well.. Now that we smoothly slid onto here I'm against all kind of animal abuse and abandoning animals. But I'm not against human abuse, I mean it's never awesome if child get beaten. But if thee's 2 articles one telling that someone threw dog from a bridge and other one that child got threw from a bridge. I get anger for the animal abuser. And in movies/series if animal gets killed it's the most horrible thing that could happen :( Now saying that someone might expect that I'm some kind of animal activist etc. But I'm not. That's just my opinion and if someone asks that's it. But I'm not like force feeding my 'believes' to anyone.


So back to the shoes! Today in the mail was also Miss Mix -magazine (It's not as sex filled like Cosmo, but it's not like teen -teen magazine either.) so  as I was just going trough it and eyeing it. I bumped into these shoes.
They are just pure awesomeness, with I don't even know!
I just can't stop laughing while watching them! C'mon IT HAS A TAIL!
I kinda want these, but I don't think I would be bold enough to actually wear these in public... And well they don't fit into my style.
But these shoes are just ridiculously adorable :'D
Also when I was searching that pic from net I bumped onto same shoes, but there's not tail, instead of that a leopard head as the peak (like where's that Adidas -mark is, there's head).

And these shoes made me think of Puma, and Puma has new set of fragrances. For men and women.
Yellow (w) and Green (m).
I had a chance to go and try these yesterday when I was at movies (that's located in mall). And I think both of them are actually good. Usually just either one is good. So it's kinda rare that they succeeded to make both good! I think I might get the Green. And good think about Puma's fragrances is that they are cheap! I mean they are closer to 20€ than 50€... 

But it's not on my priority list of buying new fragrance! My current number one that I need to buy is Dolce Gabbana's The One (for men). But that one is too expensive, so I have to wait till I find it cheaper. I love the fact that on ships & airports items are tax free so they are so much cheaper! And of course it depends of the country and their currency. Like I would get that fragrance so much cheaper on States than in Finland! 

I think that was pretty much it for this post. I also took nice photo of Einari when he was sleeping on my bed today earlier. Well he's still sleeping on my bed, but just changed his position & placement.